Finis

I'm leaving behind my baby mama days.  It's been decided there will be no more ultrasounds, belly wet with jelly, wide smile on my face.  No more pushing the cart through the grocery store with a sleeping infant on my chest and knowing looks on older women's faces.  I'll be giving those looks instead.  I went through the bins of baby sized clothing in the garage.  I set aside a few favorite outfits that make happy tears spring up, but the rest is waiting for a trip to the Pregnancy Resource Center.  I'm comforting this loss of mama riches and memories by picturing expectant ladies happily thumbing through racks of my cherished baby clothes and dreaming of their own babies wearing these adorable outfits.

And when I write like this, the decision makes me sad, longing.  But when I look at my girls sleeping, cozy in their sister sharing room or look about our bed when our family of four is cuddled up on Saturday morning; I know that this is right.  We are complete and I can just feel it.  Just like I felt distinctly that we would have another baby before Lucy came along, I just feel that we are done.

All images by the lovely Brea Bursch